How to Deal With Being Rejected
Whenever I think about rejection, two Playmate incidents come to mind. The first was hilarious! The year was about 2004/2005, I worked as a Bunny at a Superbowl party in Jasonville Florida. At the end of the night while we all gathered in the green room to wait for our limo, two Bunnies burst in, wasted and stumbling (that’s not common), one yelled out about how the other the Playmates threw herself at Aston Kutcher. He didn’t care for her, which is a surprise now given what we all know about him, he passed. The poor girl was so embarrassed that she body slammed the other girl smack onto the floor. Lots of Playmates are Black Belts, FYI. That’s when I realized that rejection is painful, even for those who witness it.
As a single person, one thing that you cannot avoid is rejection: it comes with the territory. Sometimes it can be cold and in your face, others can be passive. The result is the same, you were not wanted, the person felt as if they could do better. That’s the cold hard fact. When a person rejects you it’s because at the end of the day, they really can do better. It might or might not be true, however, that’s their prerogative and there is absolutely no point in trying to convince them otherwise. Keep your dignity while dating, it what makes you beautiful, respect for yourself is a great trait to have.
When you are lucky enough to be rejected the overwhelming emotion should be appreciation. You are thankful that someone valued you and your time enough to allow you to move on and find someone who appreciates you. That’s a very nice gesture and you should express that to the person and move on. If you don’t have any loose ends to tie up, delete the number and severe communication. Again, this is to preserve your dignity incase you have an embarrassing moment of weakness.
It’s always so great and easy to do the rejecting, isn’t it? I see people who reject so haphazardly that it’s no wonder their dating Karma is all screwed up. They rejections are gray and unclear or they simply ignore. It’s all for p*ssies! If you date and want to be treated with respect you must do the same to others. Reject people in the exact manner that you would like to be rejected.
But let’s focus on being rejected for this post, you are welcome to view my follow up blog for tips on How to Reject. As a model, my whole career was about being rejected. No one would tell me why and it didn’t matter, I wasn’t the right person for them. But what I would tell myself each time was that they were the losers. I was right for every job and if they didn’t see that, too bad for them. I felt sorry for them.
Now with dating when a guy didn’t care for me, my assumption was that he didn’t like women…at all. Is that true? Were the men who passed me up gay? Absolutely. Why wouldn’t they be, who wouldn’t want to be with me? That’s the attitude you need to have because the other way of thinking just pisses me off.
“What’s wrong with me?”
“Why don’t they like me?”
There is nothing wrong with you! If someone doesn’t like you, there is something wrong with him or her! Resist the urge of allowing every rejection to send you on an emotional roller coaster. It’s a part of life, no one is above it, and everyone has been rejected at one point or another. The way to minimize rejection is by dating with a strategy. Throwing caution to the wind and pretending to be a hopeless romantic will put you in bad situations.
I never feel the need to beg, convince, or negotiate with someone after being rejected, not now
Go through your phone and delete the numbers of people you “like” who have not called you in the last two weeks. You can’t help that they rejected you but you can control your behavior.